Pumpkin Muffins



Ingredients:


1 ¾ cups all-purpose flour (I use organic flour)

1/3 cup sugar (I use organic sugar)

2 tsp baking powder

¼ tsp salt

1 tsp ground cinnamon (I use organic)

½ tsp ground nutmeg

1/8 tsp ground cloves

1 beaten egg

¾ cup milk

¼ cup cooking oil

½ cup canned pumpkin

¼ cup chopped nuts (optional)


Directions:

In a mixing bowl combine flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves. Make a well in the center. Combine egg, milk, oil, and pumpkin; add all at once to flour mixture. Stir just until moistened (batter should be lumpy). Stir in chopped nuts if desired. Lightly grease muffins cups or line with paper bake cups; fill 2/3 full. Bake in a 400 degree oven about 20 minutes until center is done. Remove from pans; serve warm. Makes 10-12.

**The recipe said not to use paper bake cups with the pumpkin recipe so I used the aluminum bake cups and they worked just fine. I’ve made 4 dozen of these and put most in the freezer so they won’t go bad and we can pull one out as we want to eat them. Hope you enjoy!!**

I'm Afraid of Lightbulbs!!

For many, many years I have had this weird fear of light bulbs. I will not change any light bulb that is above my head. Ha...the only light bulbs I change are those in table lamps or floor lamps.

I get made fun of...heckled at...and even laughed at for this fear. One friend, whom shall remain nameless (she knows who she is) has teased me endlessly about this fear...that is until she saw why I was afraid (McCall, Idaho incident).

You see...light bulbs do not like me. It never fails that one explodes on me at least once or twice a year. Has my husband ever had one explode on him? Has my mother had one explode on her? Has my friend who teases me endlessly ever have one explode on her? NO...NO...and NO!!

Time passes and I became a bit daring and started changing light bulbs above my head again and guess what happens?

Well...it was 1:30 am and I had been working on homework. I was ready for bed and began shutting down the house. I forgot something in the living room so I turned on the dining room light and "BOOM" the light bulb in the dining room exploded, sending shards of glass EVERYWHERE and triggers the circuit breaker. Yeah...see...this time I wasn't even changing a bulb!!! Thank God nobody was sitting underneath this light when this happened!!!

I was not a happy girl (many at this point would interject and ask when am I ever happy...hehehe). This mess took me 45 minutes to clean-up (at 1:30 in the morning) and I still found glass pieces for several days ALL OVER the house, in my laundry, and in the carpets. Ha...even on the piano bench...LOL!!

SO...for all you people who make fun of me for my fear of light bulbs...BITE ME!!!!

Chicken Breasts with Raspberry Sauce

Well...for this post I planned on ranting because I had a horrible day.  However, you all are lucky because it's 1:33am and I am too tired to rant. 

I've been making some new recipe's lately and they have been awesome.  Here is the recipe for what I made tonight.  It was awesome!!!  I'm not taking the time to spell check tonight so you will have to deal with my errors.

Chicken Breasts with Raspberry Sauce

Ingredients:

4 medium skinless, boneless chicken breast halves (about 1 pound total)
1/2 teaspoon dried thyme, crushed
1/2 teaspoon dried sage, crushed
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
       Nonstick cooking spray
1/4 cup seedless raspberry jam
2 tablespoons apple juice
1 tablespoon Sherry wine
       Fresh Raspberries (optional)

Directions: 

1.  Rinse chicken; pat dry.  Combine thyrme, sage, saltm and pepper; rub over chicken breast halves, coating evenly.

2.  Coat a 10-inch skillet with cooking spray.  Add chicken to skillet.  Cook over medium heat for 8-10 mintues or until tender and no longer pink, turning once.  Remove from skillet.  Keep warm.

3.  Stir together jam, apple juice, and Sherry wine.  Bring to boiling.  Boil gently, uncovered, about 2 minutes or until suace is reduced to desired consistency.  Serve sauce over chicken.  If desired, garnish with Raspberries.  Makes 4 servings. 

For sides I made Olive Oil and Roasted Garlic Coucous and a delicious side salad with Ceasar salad dressing.  Ha...I put the tomoato on my plate for the picture and then gave it to Kortney because I can't eat tomatoes.    I'm so glad that I found something so tasty that I can eat.  Can't wait to make it again. 

Btw...the plate pictured is not some huge old plate just filled with food.  I eat my food on salad size plates...it helps with controling portions.  Actually...I've been serving the whole family on the smaller plates for several weeks now.  It really works!!!

I'm headed to bed now.  I'm very grumpy and I have to get up very early tomorrow.  Busy day with homeschool activities, Project Rudolph, my school work, and...oh yeah...it's my 15th Wedding Anniversary tomorrow.  Oooppsss...I guess I mean today.

Ciao!!!!



Yes....I Run Off A Remote Control

Since having two surgeries last April I have had a ton of questions about what type of surgeries I had and what it was for. At the time I was a bit hesitant to share everything as I was pretty embarrassed about the whole situation. Now that I am more comfortable with what is going on I will explain some things.

While living in Japan in 2005 I started having some female problems. The doctors there told me it was really nothing and that I was too young to have anything major wrong with me; I was 28 at the time. Well...they were wrong. Four surgeries in less than two years tells me that yes...there was something wrong and that they could have caught it had they been listening to me. I believe that had my issues been caught then, I would not be dealing with the chronic illness that I am dealing with now.

The surgeries I had in April were for Intercystitial Cystitis...aka...a chronically inflamed bladder. This December will be two years that I have been struggling with this disease. In April I had an Interstim device implanted in my back and also left buttock. In my back is a neurotransmitter that sends a continuous electrical impulse to my sacral nerves, the nerves that control bladder pain and functioning. In my left buttock between the muscle and fatty tissue is where the battery was implanted.

Here are a few questions that I have been asked over the past several months:

1. What does the device look like?  Below is the battery pack that was inserted in my left buttock.



2.  Can you feel the electrical impulses? Yes...I can. When I had the trial device I would even get a crazy jolt every now and again; especially when I bent over to pick something off the floor or when tying my shoes.

3. Where do you feel the electrical impulses? I'm not telling on the internet...LOL!! If you are that curious you can email me and I will send you a reply.

4. Can you feel the battery when you are sitting? I did at first, but not really too much anymore. I do notice that when the weather gets bad that my bottom aches in that area. When it bothers me I just rub the area. Yes...that means I walk around rubbing my booty; I don't really care what people think anymore. Ha...according to my son everything revolves around my butt....LOL!!!

5. Can you turn on and off the device yourself? Yes...I have a remote control that I always carry on me. I was a bit worried about the remote at first because I kept picturing Jake getting into my purse and saying, "Hey mom, what's this?" Then, press all the buttons and me getting zapped. However, the remote only works when placed over the battery itself. I will admit that was hard for me to get used to, especially in public; nothing like drawing attention to yourself and your booty. However, I got over this real fast...its life; nothing I can do about it. So…I’m not going to worry about what other people think; they don't know what I’ve gone through.  Below is what my remote looks like.



6.  Does the remote control when you go to the bathroom?  No...once the device is turned on I go through my day like I normally would.  All bodily functions continue to work the way they normally would. 

7. Does the device set off alarms at the airport and stores? Sometimes yes...sometimes no. At stores it depends on how close I walk by the theft detector. If I happen to set it off I pretend like I don't hear it and keep on walking....LOL!

8. Does it hurt when you exercise? Yes it does. So...I haven't done much exercising in the past six months. However, overall the pain has been subsiding so I am going to try running again. I feel so much better physically, when I do.

9. Does the device help with my disease? Overall...yes it does. I still have bad days...but...now my bad days are better than my good days when I didn't have the device. For example, it used to be that I could not go out to dinner with friends without having to go to the bathroom 6-7 times; sometimes more often. Now, I can sit through a several hour meal and not have to go at all. I also used to go to the bathroom about 25-35 times a day. Now...on a good day I only go about 8-10 times. My pain has also decreased. I still have pain every day but not like I used to. At one point, before treatment, I got to where I didn't even want to leave my house anymore.

Those are just some of the basic questions. I have to say that I would not wish this disease on my worst enemy. I still struggle physically every day, but I’m very thankful for the relief that I do receive from the Interstim implant.

And The Winner Is.....

I had Jake draw the winning name for my "Celebration Contest."  Each name of the people who left a comment either on my blog page or on certain Facebook links were written on a small piece of paper and then folded in half, then in half again.  I had Jake close his eyes and and draw a name.

Drum roll please.....bah dum...bah dum...bah dum.....

And the winner of the "Celebration Contest" drawing is.....INDA!!!!!!!

I already have your address so I will be putting a box of goodies together for you this week.  Will be in the mail by Friday, September 24th.  CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!  I know Terry will be happy ;)

A Celebration Contest

Up until recently, my blog has been read by people in the US, Germany, United Kingdom, and Italy. Not surprising as I have friends who live in all those countries. However...after checking my stats I can now say that I also have readers from Canada, Australia, Thailand, Czech Republic, Indonesia, and Iraq. Holy Cow!!!! Never in a million years did I think my blog would have readers from the countries mentioned above.

I took several years off from writing and at the beginning of this year I attempted to start up again, at the request of several friends. But...due to some personal reasons I just could not get into it. It wasn't until just a few short months ago that I felt that I could pursue blogging again. Based on feedback that I have heard from my readers I have learned three things:

1. Some of you like what I have to say.

2. Some of you don't like what I have to say.

3. And the rest read to keep up with what is going on with me.

For me, writing is relaxing; it is my "me" time. It helps me become a better person. I love making people laugh and smile, even if it is at my expense. I also find it rewarding when I write something that touches someone's heart. When I write, you are seeing who I truly am. I am a real person, with real problems, real hurts, real dreams, real joys, and a real heart. I am ME!!!!

In celebration...I am hosting a contest. If you are a reader of my blog leave a comment either here on blogger or on my Facebook link. I will send the winner a goody box filled with all kinds of German delicacies. All the names of those who leave a comment will be placed in a drawing. Drawing will take place on Sept 19, 2010. I will post the winner on my blog and on Facebook on Sept 19th by 6:00pm Eastern Time

I just want to say THANK YOU to all the people who are reading my blog. It's SO encouraging to me!!!

Stressed Spelled Backwards = Desserts

Yes...this is me eating...AGAIN. This time I'm eating freshly made doughnuts sprinkled with cinnamon sugar. I ate all seven of them by myself and had my stomach been big enough I would have had seven more. You could say I eat when I am stressed and that would be quite true; didn't you know stressed spelled backwards is desserts. Makes total sense to me...LOL! Ask anyone who knows me and you will find that I am the Dessert Queen. LOVE making them and LOVE eating them.

We all have stress in our lives. Some stresses are our (btw...did you know that 'are' and 'our' are homonyms-something I learned while working with Jake this week...lol) own fault and others we have no control over. My busy schedule is my own fault....LOL!! Currently, I am homeschooling my two WONDERFUL children, attending school myself...FULL TIME, taking piano lessons, playing piano for church, and am Vice President/Event Coordinator for a wonderful charity called Project TLC-Serving Those Who Serve. Not to mention I have never ending doctor appointments (for myself), soon-to-be karate lessons for Jake, keeping up with house stuff, and the list goes on..and on...and on! I'm sure many of you can relate. I wouldn't have it any other way though. See...last year I didn't do hardly anything. I sat on my butt...having my own pity party...trying to get people to join me. Being stressed is a lot more fun than being sad...I just eat some dessert and it puts a smile on my face every time!!! Unfortunately, dessert also puts pounds on the booty and that’s not so cool.

Homeschooling Jakob

Homeschooling Jakob has been way different than working with Kortney; he needs A LOT more direction and guidance than she does. Although my days with him seem to be a little bit more challenging, we still seem to be getting our work done in a timely manner....most of the time.  I've already seen a huge change in his overall attitude and in general his behavior has improved. He's always a great kid....just doesn't respond to mom properly...which is something we are working on, daily!!! Jake's schedule almost mirrors that of Kortney's with a few differences.

Daily Devotion: Like Kortney, devotion is done first before anything else in the morning. Devotion time consists of prayer time, bible reading, and reading from Chicken Soup for the Pre-Teen's Soul. I have him pray for ten minutes daily. His Bible reading right now is "30 Bible Stories you’ve Never Heard Before."

History: His text is Old World History and Geography in the Christian Perspective. Right now we are learning about Asia....specifically the Fertile Crescent.

Math: Jake is using Saxon Math - Math 7/6. Math has always been one of his strong areas. Part of the reason why I decided to home school him is because his Exceptional Education Counselor from last year felt he needed to be in 7th grade math but was afraid that he was too immature to handle that course and the walk to the middle school without messing around. So...instead of holding him back academically I am teaching him 7th grade math at home so he can continue to thrive in this subject and not become bored with it because he was not allowed to be placed in a more challenging class. Jake's math comes with the teacher videos to supplement my lack of math skills. Jake hates it when I make him watch a video. But...if he's not getting a concept I say, "Oh well, go watch it anyways."

Science: Jake's favorite subject right now is science. I have to admit his science book is pretty awesome. I even tend to read it just for fun. The first chapter we learned about bugs. Now he wants a Praying Mantis as a pet. Thankfully they cannot be ordered until after January. In the meantime, he is going to do some research about them and learn how to care for one. Jake just started a new chapter this week about Mammals and will have a big project due about a specific mammal in a few weeks.

Grammar: Jake seems to be doing pretty well in Grammar. I still sit down with him every day and work on it with him. Maybe it's the English Major in me, but, I want to make sure he's getting the foundation for reading and writing that will help him be successful later in life.

Spelling/Vocab: He does great in this subject. Jake's words seem to be a bit easy for him too. The good thing is that I can use Kortney's words to challenge him if needed.

Literature: Right now Jake is reading from a text called Beyond the Horizon. One of the last stories he read was about the slave Phyllis Wheatly. What I found interesting is that I have actually read several of her writings over the years in one of my hundred English classes that I have taken but I did not know "her" story.

Poetry: Jake seems to like his Poetry. He does quite a bit more work than Kortney does. He has already memorized this huge long poem that I didn't think he would be able to. I underestimated him. One thing that I love about Jake is his never-ending surprises.

PE: Jake starts bowling this Saturday. I think I am also going to put him in a Karate class. I think that would be a great avenue for curbing his excess energy. I noticed during Flag Football Camp this summer that he benefit's from a good workout....LOL!!!

Music: Jakob is my little drummer man. He started playing last October all on his own. He has only had a few lessons. He had one lesson, broke his leg, and then the drum instructor moved away. Jake is a natural on the drums...very talented. If he keeps up the good work, I may cave and buy him an acoustic drum set. I looked at one a few weeks ago but it was not what I was looking for.

Home Economics: This may surprise many of you, but, my Jake loves to cook. Until recently he was not allowed in my kitchen due to his fascination with accidents and spills that I always had to clean. Now that he is able to clean his own messes, I share my kitchen with him once a week. Last week he made Enchilada Casserole. He pretty much did everything himself, including cutting the raw chicken into cubes. Now, with both my kids cooking once a week, I only have to cook 4-5 days. AWESOMESS!!! Below are some pictures of Jake's first meal that he prepared.

I'm very proud of Jake and the

young man he is becoming!!!

Homeschooling Kortney

I have to say that homeschooling Kortney has been pretty easy.  Frankly, it's quite relaxing having her home.  Between homeschooling and playing piano together I think we are closer than we have been in a long time.  Below are a few tidbits of information about my days with her.

1.  I don't have to pry her out of bed in the mornings.  I usually try to have her up between 8:30 and 9:00.  She usually gets started on her work right away.

2.  She likes to do her school work in her pajamas.  She will get dressed for the day after her work is finished.  Oftentimes, I will find her working in her room; especially on cold mornings. 

3.  Most days she gets all of her work done in about two to three hours.  Below is what her course load is:

Daily Devotion:  Devotion is done first before anything else in the morning.  Devotion time consists of prayer time, bible reading, and reading from a book that will help her grow as a person. I have her pray for ten minutes daily.  Her Bible reading right now consists of thirty days of girly themes from the Bible.  Her devotional I won't mention by name as I know she would be really embarrassed if I did.  All I will say is that it is about real life issues that teenagers face.

History:  Her text is Land That I Love.  It is American History with Christian views left in the text.  All of her curriculum is Christian based.  Both her and I have found this to be very interesting.

Math:  Algebra 1 using Saxon Math.  The cool thing about this program is I ordered the teacher videos to supplement my lack of math skills.  Right now she doesn't watch many of the videos as she understands what she is working on.  However...when she gets stuck I refer her to the videos.  Every problem covered in the text/tests has a video.  It's WAY awesome!!!

Science:  Kortney has been struggling a bit in science this year.  Each section has a TON of information.  Being the great student that she is, she asked if we could slow down a bit in science so that she could take notes.  So...that is what we have done.  Controlling our own schedule is one of the great benefits of homeschooling.  As of right now she has learned about the creation of the universe and about stars and constellations.  I think I am going to have her create a Power Point presentation on a constellation as a project so that she can continue to work on her computer skills as well.

Grammar:  I have been absolutely astounded at the fact that I have learned that my daughter has not been taught proper grammar after eight years of being in school.  By this point in her schooling she should know most rules about grammar and be writing more reports and other various larger writing projects.  Grammar should come naturally at this point.  For the last three weeks all we have been working on are capitalization rules and this has been a struggle for her.  Good thing I'm an English major as I have been able to give extra help and attention in this subject.  This is a subject we now work on together.

Spelling/Vocab:  She does great in this subject.  I am a little worried that the words are not challenging enough.  However....one thing that I really like about this spelling program is that test days cover several weeks at a time and she has to know what vocab words are a part of her list.  Each week builds off the next.  That is how I learned and to this day remember words that most people can't.

Health:  This has been pretty easy for her.  She has been working on cells, the heart, and muscles.

Literature:  I love the literature she has been reading.  Its Christian based and she is reading some awesome stories that I was never able to read as a kid because I was in public school.  There are also speed comprehension tests, which she has not done in public schools.  She also has to do book reports, which she has never done before either.  I have kept all my English Literature books and every once in a while I will catch her reading from them.

Poetry:  She dislikes poetry quite a bit.  I was a little wary about the poetry program.  We are only to spend two to three minutes a day on poetry.  Then after four weeks she is to be tested on the poem by writing the poem on paper from memory.  I thought there was no way that she was going to be able to remember this poem by spending such a short amount of time every day working on it.  Boy was I wrong!!  She already knows the poem and could write it if I tested her tomorrow.  You can say I was blown away.

PE:    Have not really focused on this yet.  She will be starting bowling season in a few weeks.  That counts...right?!?  She has also asked to go running with me.  I guess thats her way of kicking me in the booty and telling me I need to get moving again...LOL!! 

Music:  She has piano lessons once a week.  She also plays piano for our church at least once a week.  I am very proud of her dedication to the piano.  This is something she has wanted to learn and she has stuck with it for several years; even when she wasn't able to take lessons because I was ill.

Home Economics:  I guess daily chores could fit here.  Kortney also cooks one meal a week.  She picks out her own recipe and I only help if she asks.  She has loved this!  I think she likes it because if she cooks that means I do the dishes...LOL!!  Last week she made Chicken Cannelloni using a Macaroni Grill recipe she found online.  It was AWESOME!!!

4.  I have learned the hard way that Kortney and Jake cannot work in the same room together or we have crazy days.  Ha...I learned this on the first day of school.  Like I mentioned earlier, she either works in her room or in the office on my desk.  I mean really....you guys want to fight over pencils?!?  Ha...if you go back to the first picture I posted you can see what I'm talking about...LOL!  On the dry erase board shown in the picture Jake wrote, "Kortney stinks."  Then she writes a reply that says, "Good!"  Sibling love...LOL!!!

5.  Yesterday she told me she was proud of me.  My jaw dropped to the floor.  I asked her why she was proud of me and her reply was, "Because you are taking the time to homeschool me even though it is not something you are entirely comfortable with."  This really made my day.  I can never say it enough....I LOVE YOU, KORTNEY!!!  More than you will ever know.

The first three weeks of home school have been great!!  Kortney has been working so hard and I am SO very PROUD of her and the proper young lady she is becoming.

Letter's To Soldiers

For the next several months I will be working on a program called Project Rudolph. I am very excited to be a part of this wonderful charity created by Tawny Campbell. Project Rudolph is a program where gift bags are made and either mailed as Christmas gifts to soldiers who are deployed or handed out to soldiers in person at the AMC Passenger Terminal throughout the month of December. Last year 14,000 bags were made and delivered. A Project Rudolph gift bag consists of a decorated brown paper sack lunch bag filled with goodies. The goodies consist of one hand written letter from an adult, two hand written letters/drawn pictures from children, a Christmas ornament, German candy and American candy. Currently, we are in kick-off mode for Christmas 2010 and we could use all the help we can get. The hardest item to come by is the letters. I want to share a few letters with you.

These letters are from children:


To any service member,

'Sup, homie? Thank you for your service, dude. That's really cool that you do something like that. My bro is in Iraq. He likes it. Have fun on your leave.

Peace,
Joshua B (Oakley, Idaho)


Thank you,

Thank you to those who are fearless. Thank you to those who put on a face of stone every day to save the whole idea that our country is based on-freedom. Thank you for preserving the way of life that we all take for granted. Thank you most of all for being one of the few brave enough to take up this cause.

Taylor (Murtaugh, Idaho)


Dear Soldier,

Thank you so much for doing this for our country. You are awesome! I hope you aren't too cold and lonely over Christmas. I REALLY appreciate you (a lot). Thank you so much!

Love,
Laynee (Oakley, Idaho)


Dear Soldier,

I appreciate what you are doing for our country and everybody else. Every time my dad watches the news I hear about people going to Iraq and Germany and sometimes getting killed in other places.

My dad is in the Marines. He has gone to Iraq and fought for the country just like you soldiers. My life is trying to do good in school and hope to try to go to college to be just like my dad.

Sincerely,
Duane J (Burley, Idaho)


I've heard some amazing stories about how these letters have touched the hearts of the soldiers away from their homes during the holidays. This is something EVERYONE can be a part of. In the next few posts I will be sharing more about how the program works, some adult letters, and how YOU can be a part of this wonderful cause!!!

Please watch this Military Tribute video "American Soldier" - Toby Keith.  It is a very heart touching tribute.  It's people like those shown in this video who are receiving Project Rudolph gift bags.

A Mirror's Reflection

“Maturity is that time when the mirrors in our mind turn to windows and instead of seeing the reflection of ourselves we see others." - Unknown


Today I looked in the mirror. Shocking?? Not really...I look in the mirror every day. However, today was a bit different. I saw my hair...which was messy because I had just climbed out of my nice plush bed. I saw my ears, eyes, cheeks, mouth, and neck. Yes...these are things I see in the mirror every day, but what made today unusual? A memory from several years back...that's what!! See...it's not about what's on the outside that matters; it's really about who we are on the inside. Friends from Idaho...many of you have already heard this story so please excuse the repetition. Sometimes we all need little reminders, and this came back to me today.

Several years ago I attended a funeral of an acquaintance. While sitting there listening to friends and family speak about their loved one sharing memories, funny stories, and words from their heart; a life changing thought entered my mind. What if that was me in the casket? How would people remember me? What would my friends and loved ones say about me? Would I be proud of the legacy I left behind? My heart sunk to the floor as I thought about these things. I was not very proud of who I was. I used this experience to try and become a better person; a person WORTH remembering.

Now I do not share this story to discourage anyone. This is just what was on my heart when I woke up today. I share it for two reasons.

1). Sometimes we do not give ourselves enough credit for who we are. We are our own worst critics. It is in our nature to see the worst in ourselves. Today I encourage you to go against that nature and find a few things that are positive about yourself. I dare you!! Get a pen and paper, take ten minutes and write down five positive things about yourself. It's not going to be easy...but give it a try.

Here are mine:

a). I have a good heart and care about other people.

b). I sing pretty well.

c). I'm there for people when they need help.

d). I'm a motivated person who likes to get things done.

e). I have a lot of love to share.

2). Are we leaving a legacy worth remembering? Now...face it...we are not going to make everyone in our life happy. It's just not going to happen. So...casting all of life's jerks aside...how do you want to be remembered? I challenge you again to write down five things you would like to be remembered for. Ha...this dare is a bit easier...but not much…hehehe.

a). I want my family to remember the love I have for them.

b). I want my friends to remember me as one of the best they have ever had.

c). I want strangers see something different in me; that they will walk away saying, "Wow, who was that lady!!"

d). I want to be remembered as a person who gave my all in life, no regrets.

e). I want to leave a legacy of love, warmth, and service. I want those left behind to be proud of who I was on the inside and how I displayed it on the outside. Proud to have known me!

I encourage us all to be who we know we are supposed to be. Take the steps today to see the best in yourself and offer that part of yourself to others. You won't regret it!! It will change your life in ways you cannot imagine!!!

"Live Like You Were Dying" - Tim McGraw

No Fear!!

It seems lately that I have a fear of almost everything.  It is absolutely ridiculous the things that I am afraid of now...that I never used to be.

a.  Meeting new people.
b.  Being around large crowds.
c.  The thoughts in my own mind.
d.  Failure.
e.  Not measuring up.

Those are just a few.  Why this new found fear?  I have no idea...but I know that I don't like it!!  The examples mentioned above never used to bother me at all.  Now, when faced with those issues I break out into a sweat and become consumed with anxiety.

According to www.dictionary.com , fear is: a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid.

Obviously my fears are imagined.  And frankly, this is rather frustrating.  Most times, the thing I fear never even comes to fruition.  It's just one big viscious cycle.  Luckily, I'm surrounded by great friends and family who put up with me...quirks and all.  Everyday I wake up I tell myself I can make it through this day; even if I have to face it hour by hour or minute by minute.

We all have fears.  No one is exempt.  But we will all make it!!!  At somepoint in our life we have to face our fears so that they do not consume our lives.  What are your fears?  How do you cope with them?  Are you ready to kick them to the curb?

"Broken" - by Lifehouse

Happy Birthday to ME!!!!

Yesterday I shared "33 Things for 33 Years," today....since it is my actual birthday I want to share some pictures of me from throughout the years.  Yes...many will make you laugh...but...they make me laugh too.  In some of the pictures I wonder what I was thinking when it came to my hairdo and outfit.  However...they helped mold me into who I am today.  Therefore, I am going to embrace the odd little quirks I see in each picture.  I hope you all get a good laugh...I sure did!

Baby Picture

One Year Old

Kindergarten - I remember this day.  I had slept with those foam curlers in my hair all night.

All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth.

Day I ran my very first 5k.  Our girls team took 1st place.

I remember this yellow dress being my most

 favorite dress ever.

This was my favorite bike.  One day I left it out and some mean kids in the neighborhood smashed it all up.  It was my birthday present (I loved the Smurfs) and I only had it a few days.  Mean kids!!!

 

Disecting a pig in Biology Class.

Junior Prom

Senior Prom

Senior Picture

Another Senior Picture

From here fast forward several years....I have a ton of photos I could share but I think you might get bored if the post is too long...LOL.  The beginning of this post shows me as a baby....the end of this post will show me at 33 (well almost...these shots were taken a week before my 33rd birthday).

Mug Shot 1

Mug Shot 2

I can't say that growing up has been easy; I can say that it has been interesting.  I am now at the age my mom was when I moved to California where I met all my friends from Desert High.  I also have a daughter the same age I was when I attended Desert High.  Back then I remember thinking my mom was old....LOL!  And you've guessed right Kortney thinks I'm old too.  Do I feel old?  No Way!!  Maybe my body is aging...but my heart is still young!!!!

33 Things for 33 Years....

Well....tomorrow I turn 33. I'm not sure exactly what that means except that I will be another year older....LOL! I've been thinking A LOT lately about many things. I know...I know...many of you are thinking "uh oh" as I write this. Rest assured that most of this thinking has been good. One of the areas I have been pondering is how I can be a better person on the inside and out. Just when I think that I've got myself all figured out...something in life happens...a "Detour," and I learn that I am not who I thought I was at all. Self-reflection can be both good and bad. The good is one can see their strengths...the bad is one also gets to see their weaknesses. Although rough in the beginning, seeing ones weaknesses turns out to not be as bad as originally thought because we are able to learn from them and grow. So...as a small token to my 33rd birthday I am going to share 33 things about myself. Be afraid...very afraid!!



1. My favorite color is black.

2. One day I would like to write a book-just can't think of a topic someone would find worth reading...LOL!

3. I don't like doing laundry and I wash my hands after every load I put into the washer.

4. My dream car is a BMW iSeries Convertible.

5. I have 14 classes left until I finish my BA in English with a Minor in Journalism.

6. I pop my knuckles and it annoys most people. Sometimes I do it on purpose just to be annoying :).

7. I don't give myself enough credit for the talents that I do have and often focus on those I wish I had.

8. I planted flowers in window boxes this summer and I haven't killed them yet...this is huge for me...LOL!

9. Two years ago I realized that my whole life I've never let myself REALLY feel...now I feel EVERYTHING and it's sometimes overwhelming.

10. I cried when I found the first "I hate you" note when I was cleaning one of my kids' rooms and I immediately called my mom and apologized for all the "I hate you" notes that she found when I was a kid.

11. I love the US military and every day I wish I could do more to support our soldiers home and deployed.

12. I burp when I'm eating at the dinner table...only at home though...hehehe!!

13. In my house....Josh Groban is considered my "boyfriend" by my family. But to his credit a few of his songs have really helped me thru hard times.

14. I think SBD's are hilarious when done by me...but disgusting when someone returns the favor...LOL!

15. I love writing and find it therapeutic.

Ok... almost half way. Wow...this is harder than I thought it was going to be. Let's see.....

16. There are things that I would like to tell a few people in my life and I'm not sure I will ever get the opportunity because I am not sure how they would respond...and I don't want to be hurt.

17. Chronic illness has majorly changed my life in more than one area and I feel like I've lost part of who I am.

18. I care too much about what people think.

19. “Titanic” makes me cry. Ok…so do most sappy love stories…most recently “Dear John” and “The Notebook.”

20. I love Sunflowers and Gerber Daisies....they are my favorite flowers because they are bright and cheerful!!

21. I don't like to see people hurting...it makes me hurt too.

22. There are some people in my life who will never know how much I love them.

23. I'm addicted to shoes. I love sexy high-heels and motorcycle boots.

24. I ran a half-marathon and crossing the finish line did not feel as good as I thought it would. I used running as an escape from some things going on in my life. I want to run another one the right way so crossing the finish line will feel like it's supposed to.

25. When I was younger I always wanted to be a drummer in an all girls rock group. Hahaha...I can play the drums...but not well.

26. I LOVE music. My life would be incomplete without music. I believe there is a song for everything. And I love singing those songs!!

27. When I was a teenager and I had a crush on someone...I listened to Mariah Carey and Celine Dion endlessly.

28. The feeling I get when I finish a quilt is amazing. Knowing what the starting pieces looked like and seeing the final product is so rewarding.

29. I like it when my dog licks my feet.

30. I try to be the best person I can be everyday...but realize I am human and make mistakes just like everyone else.

31. I’m a FaceBook addict…LOL! If it weren’t for FaceBook I would not have got to see some wonderful people in the past 6 months.

32. The world cannot hold all the love I feel for my friends and family.

And finally.......

33. I'm thankful for another year. Another year to learn more, love more, live more, and be more!!!!

Now...here is one of those sappy love songs I listened to as a teenager...LOL! 

 I know I'm not the only one who listened to this...hehehe!!

Mariah Carey - Love Takes Time

Uh Oh!!! Detour....

Monday of last week my husband was driving to base only to find out that the direct route from our house to the base had been closed and a detour had been set up. This detour adds 10 minutes to our drive each way....and will until sometime in November. Very frustrating!!! Every time I make that drive...which is often...I become frustrated at the interruption in my day that this detour has caused.

I am the type of person who likes things in order and when I have my day planned I don't do well with changes that arise. Well...what about life changes…things that majorly disrupt how I think life is supposed to be?? Yeah...I don't do so well with those either.

The road to the base is closed for repairs. The road had quite a few holes in it and was rough to drive on. A new road is being paved for a smoother, safer drive. Detours in life do the same thing. They pave the wave for a more comfortable ride. They take us on a new path that can aid in averting damage and disasters. They cause discomfort at first and may be hard to get used to. We may even question why a certain detour was created. I actually drove around one night just to see if I could find a faster more efficient route to the base, and I learned that the route provided WAS the best route. Life is the same way. We question the direction our lives are taking and often become frustrated with the changes that may come our way.

On this drive, I learned the significance of detours; I no longer become upset on the drive to base. This detour is going to make later trips more efficient and safer for my family and vehicle. And...I've learned that I need to embrace life’s detours as well. Instead of complaining about these detours...I need to embrace them...a better path is being created; a path that may seem uncomfortable at first, but will have a rewarding outcome in the end.

Here is a song I found on YouTube.  Can't say it will be a favorite of mine...but in a way it went along with this post.  "Detour".

Tasty Tuesday - Lentil and Sausage Soup

I'm often asked what types of meals I feed my family.  Mostly I make Weight Watchers Dinners...which surprisingly taste really good.

A dish that I have been making lately is "Lentil and Sausage Soup."  Nick and the kids like it therefore,  I usually make a double batch so that there are some leftovers.  I've not tasted it because I don't like beans and there are tomatoes in it, which I cannot eat.  But...I can tell you that if Kortney and Jake are eating it...it's got to be good....LOL!

Ingredients:

2 teaspoons olive oil
2 carrots, thinly sliced
1 onion, diced
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/4 pound turkey kielbasa, thinly sliced
1 1/4 cups browns lentils, picked over and rinsed
5 cups water (I use organic vegetable broth)
1 (14 1/2 ounce) can diced tomatoes
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper

Directions:

1.  Heat the oil in a large saucepan over medium heat.  Add the carrots, onion, and garlic.  Cook, stirring frequently, until softened, about 5 minutes.

2.  Add the kielbasa, lentils, and water; bring to a boil.  Reduce the heat and simmer until the lentils are tender, about 30 minutes (I've noticed the lentils take about 45 minutes to become tender).

3.  Stir in the tomatoes, salt, and pepper.  Simmer until heated through, about 5 minutes longer.

**I think this dish would be really good with some cornbread drenched in butter...but remember to factor in the extra fat and calories**

I'd like to end this post with a small chuckle...enjoy!!

Song: "I Love My Food"

I know that in my last post (which I deleted) I said that I wasn't going to restart my blog like I had anticipated. Well...since April things have changed and I feel like I can now write and be an encouragement to other people.

While in the states I made a visit to Ross and came across a book called, "God Is Always with You." The first page I opened really spoke to my heart so I bought the book. Turns out it is a journal, and a WONDERFUL one at that. I want to share my journey through this journal with you. I had said before that I wanted to be open and honest in my writings and I think this is a way I can share comfortably in that fashion. So…this blog will not only be about family happenings but also my progression through this journal. It is my hope that everyone who reads this blog will somehow be strengthened and encouraged in some way as I myself am encouraged by writing it.

“EVER PRESENT”

Quote: “When I walk by the wayside, He is along with me….Amid all my forgetfulness of Him, He never forgets me.” – Thomas Chalmers

Poem:
There’s not a tint that paints the rose

Or decks the lily fair,

Or marks the humblest flower that grows,

But God has placed it there….

There’s not a place on earth’s vast round,

In ocean’s deep or air,

Where love and beauty are not found,

For God is everywhere.


At every moment, God is calling your name and waiting to be found. To each cry of “Oh Lord,” God answers, “I am here.”


Scripture:  God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear. – Psalm 46:1-2 (NIV)

*Source: God Is Always with You-Promise Journal – Entry#1, “Ever Present”
Compiled by Joanie Garbog, Designed by Mark Thurbur, and published by Lake House Gifts.


My Thoughts:

After all God has done for me over the last 12 years, how can I ever forget his power? Yet…over the last 2 years this is what I have done. How is it that I came to think that God could help everyone else but me? For me, the answer is pride. God could help me, I just wouldn’t let him. Why? Frankly…I’ve been angry with Him along with everyone else. I’ve been angry at the whole world. I was also tired of being the good girl who always got hurt. I acted out in my angry state, hurting people close to me and that I love dearly. I've made some bad mistakes. Thankfully…God is forgiving, “Ever Present” and STILL with me even when I don’t want him around. Today is a new day; a day to embrace my “Ever-Present” God with fresh eyes and an open heart. Join me on the powerfully journey into the soul…my soul. And…remember God is ALWAYS with you even when you can’t seem to find him.

I'm a music fiend and will be sharing music links as well.  This song is called "Never Alone," by Barlow Girl.

"Never Alone" by Barlow Girl

Weight Loss Part 2

For my last weight loss blog entry I discussed how I changed my eating habits. This entry will focus on exercise and maintenance.

I learned very quickly that daily exercise is very important. After I had my hysterectomy it took me quite awhile to get moving. I don’t even think I started walking until mid December of 2008. When I did start walking it would take me about thirty minutes to complete a mile. I actually only started out walking a half a mile at a time as that is all my body would allow me to do. Every week I gradually increased my distance by one lap at the track. Next thing I knew I was at one and a half miles.

It was at this point where I started jogging. It’s actually quite funny…I would walk two laps then jog one …walk two laps then jog one. Then I would walk one…jog one…and so on. As I did this I gradually increased my distance. When I hit about the three mile mark I decided to train for a Half Marathon. I used the Hal Higdon training schedule as my guide for training:

(http://www.halhigdon.com/halfmarathon/index.htm).

I did not follow it exactly. I didn’t do any of the strength training he recommended. If I train for another Half Marathon I would incorporate the strength training as it will help with time. I didn’t do it then because I wasn’t sure how to go about creating a strength training program and I didn’t really have the time to research it.

As I trained for the Half Marathon the miles that I ran increased. There were several short runs and one long run every week. Towards the end I was running/walking about 25-30 miles a week. The shorter runs I was able to run most of and the longer ones I would walk fast/jog about equal distance.

I think the key here is setting a goal and being consistent. With the right diet and regular exercise the weight will come off. Habits are hard to change but once they are changed they are easy to keep. You won’t feel miserable forever. You will start to notice that your body actually craves foods that are good for you and it will crave exercise too.

I will admit I have not done much running since I have been here in Germany. However, as soon as I am recovered from all my surgeries and given the “all clear” to exercise, I will be adding it once again to my daily schedule. I feel so much better when I do.

As far as weight maintenance…I wish I could help there. I actually have no clue how I have kept my weight off. Although I have not totally reverted back to my old eating habits I have once again started eating desserts, candy and rich foods. I live in a country that when you go out to eat one portion can feed the whole family…LOL! I eat about one third of what is given to me and either share the rest with someone in my family or I take the rest home and eat it for another two meals. The only thing that I can think of is I now eat breakfast EVERY morning; I can’t function without eating breakfast. I didn’t eat breakfast for twenty years. I’ve always heard that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and I fully believe that now. Just make sure you eat something that is healthy and the right portion size.

I hope this has helped. Best of luck to everyone!! You CAN do it!!!

Picture below is the first professional picture I had done since I lost my weight...it is my "after" picture :). I'm sure most of you have seen it on FaceBook. My "before" picture is on the "Weight Loss Part 1" post.

Weight Loss Part 1

Ok…so here is the weight loss post as promised. Well, part one at least…LOL! As I mentioned a few weeks back I was celebrating a year of keeping my weight off. I had lost 50lbs and went from a size 16 to a size 8 from Sept 2008 to March 2009. I wish the answer to how I lost it was simple, but it really isn’t. I don’t actually have a precise answer. All I can do is share what I did to lose the weight and what I think is the reason why I have kept it off.


I’m not sure how many of you know this or not, but I had a hysterectomy in Sept of 2008. A few weeks after my surgery, someone asked me if I had been losing weight. My answer was, “Not that I know of.” Later that night I got on the scale at home to see if I had and I saw that I had lost 18 pounds without even trying. I know…not exactly what you wanted to hear…18lbs WITHOUT EVEN TRYING. Actually, I should say without consciously trying. After my surgery, it took me several weeks to regain my appetite. So…in reality…I had cut back on my food consumption and this had caused my stomach to shrink and decreased my caloric intake.

I also had to change my diet due to some other health issues I had been having. I’m still dealing with these same issues today . I cut out all sodas, candy, and chips for over a year. Foods like pizza, lasagnas, and casseroles…I still do not eat these items. I also cut out most processed foods and fast food items. Now I can’t stand eating at fast food places. I prefer a Caesar Salad over a Burger any day. You are probably thinking, “Well what in the world did you eat then?” Yeah…let’s just say that I only ate because I had to not because I wanted to.

It was at this point where I thought, “Well…I’ve lost 18lbs let’s see how much more weight I can lose.” So…I started Weight Watchers with my next door neighbor. Let me just say that I never thought of this as a diet. I had noticed that Weight Watchers actually had a lot of foods/recipes that I could eat AND make for the whole family. They have some really cool cookbooks!! Weight Watchers is not really a diet at all; it is a lifestyle CHANGE. Weight Watchers taught me about portion sizes, caloric intake needs, and regular exercise. No…they did not pay me to say this…LOL! The thing about Weight Watchers is that you can eat whatever you want but you have to stay within your allotted point range. You learn real quickly what foods to eat and what foods not to eat. For example a small order of fries from McDonalds is 11 points. When you only get 22 points a day, do you really want to allot half of your food points for the day on fries? No way!!! You’ll be starving the rest of the day.

So…the first thing that I did was change my eating habits. Basically, I went to whole food meals and kept track of my portion sizes. Most people do not realize what portion sizes really are and often fulfill their caloric intake for the day in one meal. I wrote down and logged EVERYTHING I ate and drank every day. And here is something that will make you smile; I ate ALL day long. Breakfast...snack…lunch…snack…dinner…snack…AND 6-8 bottles of water a day. The key is to stick with it. I weighed myself once a week. Some weeks I did not lose any weight, others I lost several pounds. The pounds add up and one day it’s like, “Oh my goodness….I’ve lost 20lbs!!!”

I hope this helps. There are two other areas that I will write about shortly, exercise and maintenance. This first post is just a teaser as I have to head to bed; big day tomorrow…surgery #2.

Btw…an awesome website that is FREE and is similar to Weight Watchers is www.sparkpeople.com. This program is very comparable to Weight Watchers and there are no fees to use it; a great place to start researching while I am recouping and writing the next post.


Also...below is a picture of my face close to when I was at my heaviest.  I weighed about 20 lbs more when I was at my heaviest than what you see in this picture.  It may look familiar to some of you as it is also on my Facebook page.

Musings From Mother

While sitting in the hospital with Jake I had a lot of time to ponder about my life and where it is going. I have been reflecting on the past couple of years especially. There have been quite a few events in the past few weeks that have made me realize that there are many things that I have taken for granted. One of those has been my kids.


Without getting into any details I will admit that the last two years have been the most arduous years I have ever experienced. Most, but not all of the struggles I have encountered have been my own fault. In the process of “not” dealing with some of my issues, I have not been the mother that my kids are used to me being. Although my children have by no means neglected, I have not been as hands on as I had in previous years and they felt this.

Jake breaking his leg has slowed me down quite a bit. There was no internet connection at the hospital, so I couldn’t really work on homework. I could read my textbook’s that is about all. Technically I wasn’t supposed to use my cell phone in the hospital; however, that was a rule that was meant to be broken. Ssshhhh…..don’t tell anyone! Although I did get busted a couple of times. Ha…let’s just say I bribed the nurse with Doritos…LOL!! While at the hospital with Jake there was no housework, laundry, or cooking to do. No place to go as I was not going to leave Jake there all by himself. I actually had quite a bit of quality time with both of my kids.

The hospital in Garmisch allows parents to sleep in the room with their children. What I did was move my bed as close to Jake’s bed as possible, allowing us to sleep next to each other. What was great was the fact Jake can’t move so he was not able to kick me or punch me in his sleep. That was a great benefit of his broken leg….hahaha!! We had a lot of fun, when we were not yelling at each other. The yelling only happened when he was being helped to the bathroom on his crutches. I have to say he was and still is quite bossy in his condition. “Don’t move my leg that way!” “Put my leg down slow!” “Mom, the nurses don’t do it that way!” “Mom, the nurses let me pee in a bottle why do I have to get out of bed?” My answer to the last question is, “BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT GOING TO PEE IN A BOTTLE AT HOME!”

Jake and I read books together, colored, and watched a few kid’s movies a friend allowed us to borrow. I have wiped his butt, washed his face, and combed his hair. Things I have not done for him in a long time. I have a feeling these are things that I will be helping with for awhile. Except, the wiping of his butt…LOL! I am working on getting him as self-sufficient as possible in that area. And as of this date I am glad to say Jake can take care of himself in that area once again.

Kortney and I had dinner alone one night and had planned on going to the Jacuzzi, but we were too tired when we went back to the room and decided to crash instead; just mother and daughter time. Kortney was a great help through all of this. She even stayed with her brother at the hospital one afternoon so Nick and I could run some errands and figure out if we were going to have to switch hotels….which luckily we didn’t. Kortney is a great girl and I can’t imagine life without her.

I had a bad dream last night. I dreamt that Kortney passed away. And I remember the feeling in my dream of the life being sucked out of me when I realized what happened to her; the feeling that I would not be able to go on without her. It was the most horrible feeling I have ever felt. It was one of those dreams you wake up exhausted because even though you are sleeping your emotions are running rampant. In real life you are feeling everything you are experiencing in your dream. I woke up this morning realizing that my kids miss their mom, and I miss being the mom that I used to be. I’m thankful for my loving and forgiving children. I cannot imagine my life without their hugs, smiles, and laughter. I cannot imagine Jake not putting critters in my bed and laughing as he hears me squealing from the other room; or finding food, money, and gum in the jeans of his pockets. Nor can I imagine a house of silence because Kortney was not playing her piano or asking a hundred question about some off the wall topic. I’m thankful for my children, Kortney and Jakob….I love you with all of my heart!!!

Back To Blogging by Request

After many requests…my blog which I haven’t touched in three years is back up and running. I have had several requests over the last several months to begin writing again. I honestly had no idea that so many people actually visited my page. I plan on updating at least once a week. There may be times when I update more often but my main plan is just a once a week update. I mean…my life is not really that interesting…although some of you guys think otherwise.
For my first post I’ll share that I am considering training for another half marathon. Not sure which one yet. But marathons and half marathons take place all the time over here in the coolest locations. There is one in France in March that I have been considering. I am mentally trying to convince myself that I want to train again. I have not shared pictures with anyone yet from my marathon in May…here they are.